It came out of right field (Lemon Rosemary Scones)

I’m notorious for getting sayings wrong or just using a wrong – but similar – word for something. Last week I told my coworker, “Well that really came out of right field.” He looked at me and said, “Yeah, or left field.” If my good friend, Beth, were there she would have asked me, “Krystal, are you having a stroke?” I’m usually off just enough with these things that I just end up sounding crazy.

Case in point:

Once in an interview at Beth’s company I explained to FOUR managers that, “I’m really over the hill about working with a CMS.” I was trying to say, “I’m really over the moon.” I’m excited, I enjoy it, it gives me pleasure. Instead I said I’m really old and perhaps out of touch when working with a CMS.

Over Thanksgiving dinner this year I was explaining to my entire family how difficult it is to be a working mom who breastfeeds, especially when I have to pump in the middle of a daylong conference. I said, “How awkward to walk of a closet carrying bottles of my own excrement.” Umm, no, that’s not what I meant. Excretion. Excretion is what I meant. Not a whole lot better, but it’s not poop.

The other day I was chatting with E and talking about my ability to care for plants. I said, “It’s not that I’m a black eye, but I don’t want to have a rainforest in my house either.” E just nodded and continued with the discussion, two minutes later I realized what I had just said and yelled out, “Black THUMB!” He knew. He married me, he knew.

Several years ago E and I were walking out to our car at the mall and I said, “Where did we park? I’m so disillusioned.” Well, perhaps. But meant I was disoriented. Can I help it if I was born dizzy?! [name that reference]

I say things like this so often, I have started to avoid certain words because I just *know* I’ll say them wrong.

  • gesticulate: For some reason this word and testicle are all wrapped together in my mind.
  • literally: It literally drives me up a wall when I misuse this word. Ok, not literally.
  • self-deprecating: Am I the only one who thinks that’s just too easy to confuse with defecating. Although I do have self-deprecating humor, I don’t want to misstep and say I’m pooping myself. #awkward
  • sconce vs. scone: Ok, I’m actually throwing this one in here for my mom. She always calls the delightful pastry a sconce, which I find ridiculous.

Luckily I know the difference because I made some to share at a brunch with my best girl friends this weekend.

Kerin, Nicole, and Tara. Nicole hosted and made an amazing croissant ring with eggs and bacon.
So so good.

A couple of our main men crashed the brunch too.

Little K and Colin, best buds.


Lemon Rosemary Scones

Overall: four-star

These took a bit longer to prepare because of the glazing process, and in my opinion it made them way too sweet. So I think this could very easily be a five star recipe. (Recipe here, from The Pioneer Woman.)

Ease to Prepare: four-star

Scones sometimes scare people away, but they’re really one of the easiest pastries to make. Not a lot of mixing (in fact, make sure you don’t mix it too much. You don’t want it to break down very much.) and no kneading. But the reason this takes a little more effort than your normal scone is twofold. 1) You have to zest two entire lemons. Zesting is such a pain in the butt. Takes forever, though the results are way worth it. And 2) PW says to drop the scones into the glaze and fully coat the scones with icing. You need to be very gentle, I had several of my scones break in half at this point. So frustrating. And then once they’re glazed you need to let them dry for a couple hours to fully set.

Instructions: four-star

It’s so nice to have PW’s photos to reference as you’re working on her recipes. And she’s on the money with letting the cream, rosemary, and lemon rest together for a while (both for the scones and the icing). The flavors really pop during this time – so don’t skip that step!

I would make a couple changes to her recipe though.

  1. Don’t dunk the scones into the icing. They were so sweet, it really turned them into a dessert. Instead I’d just do a drizzle of the icing over the top of the scones. They won’t be so pixie stick sweet and they won’t take as long to set. Make sure you make only half as much icing – or less – since you won’t need to fully cover the scones this way. (Although, I made these on Friday night and took a dozen to brunch on Saturday morning and then took the other dozen to brunch on Sunday morning after a cousin’s son’s baptism. The glaze really locked in the freshness. The Sunday scones were as delicious as the Saturday scones.)

    Kari, Caden, and Pastor Skip.

  2. This recipe makes 24 scones – and that’s exactly the number of scones I came out with. I wish I had cut a second diagonal through the rectangles when I rolled them out so the scones would have been half the size. This made huge scones – and as sweet as they were, no one could finish them! Cutting them in half though would have made 48 scones. Too many. Even if you make larger scones, I think you could get away with doing a half batch with this recipe. As usual, PW portions are mammoth!
This shows the extra cuts I wish I would have made. So in all, you make a bunch of rectangles, then you make two diagonal cuts through them so you have four total triangles out of your rectangles.

This shows the extra cuts I wish I would have made. So in all, you make a bunch of rectangles, then you make two diagonal cuts through them so you have four total triangles out of your rectangles.

Food: four-star

Five cups worth of powdered sugar icing. Hello diabetes! I won’t deny I licked the spoons though…

Everyone loved the rosemary and lemon combination and they go wonderfully with a cup of coffee. I would have given these a five star rating, but they were just too darn sweet. Cut the glaze down to just a drizzle and you’re golden.

Clean up: two-star

A fair amount of clean up. Rolling out the scones (rolling pin and lots of flour on your counter top – or if you’re like me and have a porous counter, lots of flour on your pastry mat), zesting a lemon (cleaning the zester gives me a headache), baking (cookie sheets and baking mats – if you don’t have a baking mat, get one today. Definitely worth the investment. Way less burning, cooked on food, and easier clean up.), and then all the icing clean up. I know you’re tired of hearing about it, but again with the icing… I didn’t have enough racks to let them set up on, so I had to get creative.

20130308_194738_0

It left me with a lot of utensils to clean, although it got the job done!

Cost: one dollar

This recipe made some really rich scones, with not a lot of extra investment. I don’t think you’ll want to use the 5 cups powdered sugar to make the full amount of icing, so no worries there, and the rest of the recipe called for reasonable amounts of reasonable ingredients. I good recipe to wow the company with!!

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7 responses

    • Hah, wow! I definitely had that many on Saturday, but I had to pace myself. I had one while I was stuck in traffic on the way back to my house and then one later that night. And I’m pretty sure I had three helpings of your croissant ring too… I may have out ate the pregnant lady. #notashamed

  1. This was hilarious! I was reading this post while on hold and laughing like a crazy person when the person on the other line answered. Just had to let you know that your post brought out the crazy in me today : )

    “…I’m excited, I enjoy it, it gives me pleasure. Instead I said I’m really old and perhaps out of touch when working with a CMS.”

  2. You did not out eat the pregnant lady. I also had three servings of croissant plus maybe four scones? The nice part about how big they were was fewer trips back to the dish. If you had cut them in half, I would have eaten eight and that sounds way worse! 🙂

    Also that picture of the boys is amazing. Little C’s hand on Like K’s leg. Love!

    • I love that picture! There is another one where Little K is slapping Colin’s leg, while Colin is grabbing K’s face. It cracks me up every time I look at it. They look like old friends already! Smiling for the picture but pinching each other out of frame. Hah!

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